Official: Kylie is OVAH DA HILL!

Aged Aussie strumpet Kylie Minogue today officially joins the poopoo in Ye Middle Age! The sexy songbird turns 41 today, which makes her ancient by pop standards and according to the brain dead FLOPjustice followers (and rather ironically by Trolls Of The poopoo). Despite the fact that most producers are in their late 30's - early 40's and fashion is decided by 60 year old fat MINGERS...

To celebrate, here are my Top 11 Kylie videos:

#11 Wow (2008)


#10 Finer Feelings (1991)


#9 Give Me Just A Little More Time (1990/1991)


#8 Red Blooded Woman (2004)


#7 On A Night Like This (2000)


#6 In Your Eyes (2002)


#5 Word Is Out (1991)


#4 Breathe (1998)


#3 All I See (2008)


#2 Where Is The Feeling? (1995)

#1 Chocloate (2004)

Satanic Kylie!

In one of the most hilarious articles EVER posted by Australian "news" website ninemsn, Pop Princess Kylie has been outed as SATANIC! I see it now - Better The Devil You Know was about her romps with daemonic beings and Kids was a subtle way of inducting unsuspecting teens into worshipping Lucifer... and it means that the Droids were right - Kylie used her influence with him downstairs to spitefully ruin Dannii's career!

Kylie Corrupts! Recruiting The Gays to the Dark Prince.

Here is what they had to say:

Kylie Minogue

Kylie Minogue may be mostly known for her cutesy pop songs and girl-next-door style, but she's been busted doing a few things granny wouldn't approve of in her time. Bad boy rockers Lenny Kravitz and the late Michael Hutchence come to mind.

Devil lovin' moment: Singing from atop a giant devil's head on her recent X tour was about as evil as it gets from Ms Minogue.

Kylie bewitches the audience on her X2008 Tour

One can only hope that this is not serious (or more likely they mixed the real Kylie up with some VILE parasitic money grabbing talentless plastic surgery addicted wannabe who is desperate for fame and has worked the casting couches throughout Australia)... check it out (at #12) and 10 other evil rockers here.

Kylie USA 2009 - For Me, For You.

Even though Mike from Pop Trash Addicts posted about it first, as did almost every other blogger in the entire universe (because I was asleep), Kylie is finally taking a tour to the US & Canada with 6 - make that 7 and counting - dates in late September / October. Though probably an extension of X2008 with a few choice tracks omitted in favour of some stuff that was a minor hit in the US like Confide In Me (BB Hot Dance #39), Butterfly (US Hot Dance #14) or Red Blooded Woman (US Hot Dance #1), the usual alKylieda suspects rumour mill is going into overdrive with suggestions that it will be a radically revamped show where she will preview new tracks from her 11th studio album (which according to an EMI Press release, will be out this [financial] year).

To celebrate, here is another of her many US club classics - summer smash All I See (BB Dance #4), though fortunately crapper MIMS appears to have been replaced by sexy Marco Da Silva



This calls for a holiday!

ISCHGLucky...

She's got it!

Kylie kicked off her European Festival Circuit commitments today in style at the "ISHGL On Top Of The Mountain" gig in Austria- and it looks like these gigs are forming a third leg of the X2008 tour (now X2009)

Lights..... Sound.....Mind.....Body.....

Opening with Speakerphone - complete with new stage props and stunning Gaultier ensemble (half of which seems to be recycled from the Atlantis opening) and dodgy sunglasses before classics like Can't Get You Out Of My Head, In Your Eyes, Loveboat and X tracks Wow (pictured above), 2 Hearts and Like A Drug.

Up yours alKylieda! - Kylie sticks to her guns to do Loveboat

According to dek from sayhey who was there with his daughter, the setlist was:

Speakerphone
Boombox /Can't Get You Out Of My Head
In Your Eyes

Heart Beat Rock
Wow
Shocked

Like A Drug
Slow
2 Hearts

Loveboat
Spinning Around
Better The Devil You Know
I Believe In You (Ballad)

On A Night Like This
Your Disco Needs You
Kids
Step Back In Time
In Your Arms

Love At First Sight

Kylie also stated in a pre-show interview that she felt it was "time" to get recording for her 11th studio album, so with work already started there is a slight chance that a taster might slip into one of these gigs - much like In Your Eyes snuck in during the V performance...

Lucky for Kylie, (but not for straight male fans) she had finished changing...

Top Tracks of 2008

As the year draws to a close, it is traditional to reflect on what happened, remembering the good times and the bad. Today, I shall focus on some good and in typical style I haven't bothered compiling a definitive list so am making it up as I go along and have probably forgotten something.


#1 Girls Like You (Fugitive Remix) - Darren Styles

Hardcore veteran and AATW forum pin-up of choice for straight men who would indulge in a bit of man on man anal action, Darren Styles rounded off a successful year improving on his best track ever with a little help from a rather sexy remix from Fugitive and a rather fabulous video. Though due to AATW marketing, it has yet to be given a single release despite being on the schedules for months - so this will be a surefire smash in 2009 (and no doubt a feature on next years list).

Beyond Fabulous!



#2 Slow / Free (Live) - Kylie

Live Performance, X2008

Taking the sublimely sexy Slow , turn it into a twisted Nine-Inch-Nails-esque electro-rock hybrid, a giant silver skull hovering menacingly over the stage and throw in a raw vocal excerpt from unreleased track Free (previously performed on the Intimate & Live tour back in 1998) and the result is a moment of genious. Dark, moody, brooding, spine-tingling, perfect. This would be #1 if some smart cookie at Kylie HQ had ensured this was released to promote the DVD. You can see this stunning performance here.



#3 Electro Movimiento - Calle 13

Puerto Rico, Did Not Chart, Los Atras Vien Conmigo
A sexy Spanglish electronic influenced number from Puerto Rico genre bending favourites. Unfortunately only released as a digital single in the US without a video and did not chart.



#4 Respirar - Vila

Album Track, Sigue Tu Instinto

I shall be writing more about this sexy Spaniard in the future.


#5 True Believer - E Type

SWE #1, Eurotopia

First released in mainland Europe in 2007 before being picked up by AATW. Irritatingly catchy - check out the amusing video which if it wasn't on high rotation on Clubland TV would have passed me by completely

and rounding out the Top 10:

Wow - Kylie
Pop Kylie at her best - fabulous.

Break My Stride - Blue Lagoon
Released years ago in mainland Europe, picked up by AATW this year. I shall be talking more about them in the future but you can see the video here.

Who's That Girl (Seamus Haji remix) - Robyn
Hard to believe that this stunning track by Robyn could be improved - but the Haji Mix does just that. See the video here.

More More More (Winter Chill Mix) - Dannii
Club 18-30 Queen Dannii managed to get off her backside to record this sublime cover.

Gimme That Punk - Audio Bullys
The amount of name dropping alone is fabulous! See the video here.


and an unexpected bonus:
All I See - Kylie
mostly for the Live / Acoustic versions, the Extended Dub mix and the fabulously cheap video.

I Wanna Touch You - Ultrabeat
Featuring busty Rebecca Rudd on vocals, complete with a stylish video.